I didn't set out searching to be authentic, I just wanted to know what is real in this world, what is true and what is truth? Looking for it outside of myself drew me to look inside.
I'm not like most women in western culture; I have never felt inferior to men, I've not been drawn to wear make-up and trendy clothes. I see bugs and snakes and spiders as beautiful creatures as much as butterflies and swans. But the catalyst bringing the biggest difference having the most profound effect was being born into a perfect storm to develop a crippling anxiety. I grew up with the perfect family to let it grow completely out of control. I lived a double life of fear on the inside and false calm on the outside - I was living a lie, was living inauthentically aiming to fit in, while mad chaos ran wildly on the inside. This anxiety monster and its buddy depression, certainly made for lots of bad decisions and ran me into the ditch to die. Another difference between me and others was a sensitivity to the spirit world. It showed up in prophetic dreams, strong intuition, and sensing illness in others. These events led to reading and researching the metaphysical, after all I was experiencing it first hand.
When I ended up in the ditch, a 'tow truck' pulled me away from suicide, it was driven by a Spirit once known to an earth bound tribe of Warm Springs Apaches. His name is Victorio and he lived in the 1800's. He was a peace oriented leader whose experience with colonization embittered him to turn his remarkable skills toward survival as a warrior, and led to his death. Victorio is a Spirit Guide helping me fulfill the journey I am here to experience. He peppered my life with signs showing his availability to help me no matter what predicament I got myself into. He's rattled my cage, and awakened me to over come my greatest fear. It took a long time but I have come to love and trust him. The guidance he brings has empowered me to first acknowledge my authentic self; second to accept my authentic self; and now the stage of being authentic in what I do. The social mask is falling off and this transition into "being" authentic is what I share with you on this website.
Perhaps you would love to live authentically, accept yourself 100% just as you are, not only in private, but everywhere you go, and whoever you are with no matter the circumstances around you. It's not a license to criticize or judge others. You see, that sort of thing falls away through authenticity. Authenticity leads to the realization that everyone else IS PART OF YOU and the contentment you feel from self acceptance, warts and all, extends out to others, so there is no longer anything to criticize.
You may hold back from being authentic because others might not accept you. They may criticize, judge and bully you. That's a trip cord that most dare step over.
I'm stepping over the trip cord not as a dare, but because my authentic self is what is real in this world, it is the truth and what is true. I don't expect it will be a smooth path, it's not meant to be, growth is both trial and joy, but I'm willing and open.
What I share with you on this website and in my book Gloriously Flawed is the path leading to and finding authentic truth. There is anxiety, spiritual growth, past lives, healing, pathetic weakness, love and romance. To share anything less than my authentic self with you, is false. Because I value you, you and I are part of one Source, you will have access to my truth and nothing less.
If your authentic self is pregnant to be born or is hidden I encourage you to look, dig and listen. Allow your curiosity to open the beauty of your authenticity. It's there waiting for you to come alive! Baby steps or giant steps, whatever works for you is right. You may think about it for a long while, this is a giant step!
Gain inspiration from reading my story Gloriously Flawed to uncover and discover your authentic self.
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